Toys + Racism = Fun

So in the summer after my freshman year of college I worked at Toys R Us (and I should preface this story by saying that I am white). I stocked shelves, unloaded the trucks, occasionally worked the register. One day I'm walking through the store when, in the distance, I see a white guy nervously waving his hand, trying to get my attention. I walk over. He's looking around, making sure no one else could hear us, and he begins to whisper, "Hi. I just had a question. All of the Little Missy dolls here...well, I can't find any white ones. And personally, I don't have any problems with black people at all, but I was just wondering...do you have any non-colored dolls in the back?"

Okay, now let me stop here for a second.

"Non-colored"? What the fuck? A long series of possible responses raced through my mind. Isn't white a color? And conversely, isn't black the absence of color? Are you asking for a colorless, transparent Little Missy doll? I mean, I'll look, but they're extremely difficult to find...you know, being invisible and all.

So my question is: what would you have done? Would you have thought to yourself, "hey, the white customer wants a white doll, that's his business." Would you use the opportunity to have a dialogue on race and the effects of perpetuating our rigidly enforced racial barriers? Here's what Matt did: I actually said nothing to the guy. I was caught off guard, so I told him I would check the stockroom for a white Little Missy. However, once I reached the stockroom, I decided to get on the intercom and page Marco, a co-worker. Specifically, Marco was a black co-worker. I explained that a nervous white customer had requested a white doll. Then I said, "Wait, he didn't ask for a white doll...he asked for a 'non-colored' doll." Marco and I giggled. So I asked if he would be willling to take the customer a black Little Missy doll, since this had the potential to be highly entertaining. Marco thought about it and said, "Wow, that's fucking mean." So, naturally, we fished out the doll, shared one last giggle, and then Marco walked it out to the guy.

I waited in the back, out of sight, and when Marco returned he said, "Well, I gave it to him. He stared at it for a bit. Then he stared at me for a bit...then he said 'thanks' and walked off with it." My response was: "Fuck. That's very anti-climactic. I was hoping he would cry or something. Do you think he bought it, or did he just stash it somewhere and leave?" We walked around the store looking for it, but we never found the doll anywhere. Still, it's hard to believe the guy actually purchased the black Little Missy, so who knows?

My point is not to suggest that I handled this the right way, but only to relate the story. Sure, I handled it the fun way, but this probably would have gone down better if someone more mature had been in my place. I've always wondered, though: when a white person buys only white dolls for their child, is this racism? What about when a black parent buys only black dolls? In general, it's such a complicated issue that I never really know what to think. I tend to operate under one presupposition: I am a white guy who, simply by paying taxes and holding jobs, actively participates in an economy that disproportionately and unjustly favors white people...therefore Matt is a racist. Any statements I might make to the contrary would be little more than wall-paper, the flowery kind, on an old, dilapidated wall.

Thanks and take care.