The Real Question is: Did Bush Call Collect?

It's being reported today that the president has called the crew of the Discovery to discuss their difficult situation and to offer his prayers. It took a bit of work, but thanks to some hard hitting investigative work, Cerulean Blue has obtained the exclusive transcript of this conversation. Here it is in it's entirety:

Bush: Hello. Am I comin' through okay?

Discovery: Yes sir. You are loud and clear. It's a real privilege to speak with you.

B: The privilege is all mine. So. Ya'll, uh...ya'll really up there in space?

D: Yes sir, we are.

B: Ya'll see any of them space babies floatin' around? 'Cause I watched 2001 this one time and that space baby freaked me out.

D: Um...no sir.

B: Whew, that's good. So, they tell me you'll be doin' a little space walk up there later today. Ya'll got some siding knocked loose?

D: Well, technically a piece of heating plate filler is protuding and...

B: Yeah, I'll just stop you there. I know you anti-Jesus, scientist types all love your technical mumbo-jumbo, but I ain't buying it. I'll just repeat the question: ya'll got some siding knocked loose?

D: Yes Mr. President. Some heat shield "siding" got knocked loose. You're exactly right.

B: I knew it. That means ole "Heart Attack" Cheney owes me five bucks! Hot damn!

[Apparently the conversation ends at this point, when the president can be heard running off to, presumably, collect his five dollars from (and I quote) ole "Heart Attack" Cheney. ]