I solve the problem. You're welcome.
So no matter who you want to blame for last weeks catastrophe, seems like everyone agrees that someone's to blame. The response from people at every level was slow, inept, ineffective...but there may be a way to ensure that this never happens again. Here's my plan for sending a little wake up call the nations leaders:
We round up President Bush, the directors of FEMA and Homeland security, the mayor of New Orleans and the governor of Louisiana. Then we lock them all together into a broom closet for five days. They get no supplies of any kind, so they'll be forced to contend with extreme hunger, thirst and the stench of their own feces. However, this is a compassionate nation. We have to give them something, right? So, once a day, we'll slide a note under the door that says: "Help is on the way." Doesn't matter that help is not actually on the way, we'll just repeat it so that atleast we feel better. Also, let's demolish their homes, see if we can enhance the realism a bit. Only on the fifth day will we finally let them out and provide a little food and water.
Not sure if this would help, but maybe it would drive home the point that the response was just a tad inadequate (from local, state and federal officials, from everyone). It's a nice fantasy anyway, because I think we all know that, minus drastic measures of some sort, nothing is actually going to change. Hearings will be held, nothing will come of them. For these to have relevance a second party would be necessary, a second voice. Democrats, however, will remain the spineless, ineffective pseudo-politicians they are. At the very most they'll criticize Bush for a week, timidly announcing feeble condemnations before running away to cower behind their desks. Bush, for his part, will remain in full PR mode, probably releasing a photo of himself rescuing a black, wheel-chair bound orphan from the flood waters. The public, as always, will fall for it. Not sure what will happen to the state and local officials. They need to be held accountable, but I think partisan bickering will keep that from happening. Seriously, let's start a national campaign here, let's send these worthless, absentee leaders a message...which will be easy since it's only two words long: Broom. Closet.
We round up President Bush, the directors of FEMA and Homeland security, the mayor of New Orleans and the governor of Louisiana. Then we lock them all together into a broom closet for five days. They get no supplies of any kind, so they'll be forced to contend with extreme hunger, thirst and the stench of their own feces. However, this is a compassionate nation. We have to give them something, right? So, once a day, we'll slide a note under the door that says: "Help is on the way." Doesn't matter that help is not actually on the way, we'll just repeat it so that atleast we feel better. Also, let's demolish their homes, see if we can enhance the realism a bit. Only on the fifth day will we finally let them out and provide a little food and water.
Not sure if this would help, but maybe it would drive home the point that the response was just a tad inadequate (from local, state and federal officials, from everyone). It's a nice fantasy anyway, because I think we all know that, minus drastic measures of some sort, nothing is actually going to change. Hearings will be held, nothing will come of them. For these to have relevance a second party would be necessary, a second voice. Democrats, however, will remain the spineless, ineffective pseudo-politicians they are. At the very most they'll criticize Bush for a week, timidly announcing feeble condemnations before running away to cower behind their desks. Bush, for his part, will remain in full PR mode, probably releasing a photo of himself rescuing a black, wheel-chair bound orphan from the flood waters. The public, as always, will fall for it. Not sure what will happen to the state and local officials. They need to be held accountable, but I think partisan bickering will keep that from happening. Seriously, let's start a national campaign here, let's send these worthless, absentee leaders a message...which will be easy since it's only two words long: Broom. Closet.
posted by Samwick @ 1:46 AM
11 Comments:
At 4:51 AM,
Sheryl said…
Matt,
I think part of what we see as spinelessness is that the press doesn't cover anything that the Bush people don't want it to cover.
Consequently people heading the democratic party, such as Nancy Pelosi, try to find ways to insert their message in crafty ways that might slip by the press filter. It ends up making her look insipid and contrived.
But you have people like John Conyers, Jr who is anything but contrived, and he is getting around the media by hooking up with activist groups and keeping his judiciary website up to date. Henry Waxman is another who seems to be starting to realize what can be gotten across via the internet.
Because really the democrats have virtually no power to work with in Congress other than embarrassing the Republicans. Conyers has to hold unofficial hearings in the basement of Congress because he is the minority leader of the judicial committee and the Republicans won't hold hearings on things they don't want discussed.
But Conyers knows that if enough people get the message that he is holding an "unofficial hearing" on some subject, then they will pressure C-Span to show it and pressure C-Span to put things in their online archives. Once a hearing is in C-Span's online archives, then people can link to those Real media files and find out what's going on and share it with their Blogger friends.
Otherwise, people get all their news from media conglomerates who benefit from Bush's policies.
I saw Jane Fonda in an interview of BBC's Hardtalk online, and she basically said that America's mainstream media was no more. And remember, she's Ted Turner's ex, so she would know. It was no accident that he got disgusted and got out of CNN.
I like the idea of starving the diplomats. Did you hear what Barbara Bush said in Houston?
At 9:17 AM,
Snave said…
I would imagine that part of their sense of compassion (i.e. "Compassionate Conservatism") would be strong discipline combined with a feeble attempt at empathy. If so, we could give them a taste of that medicine... Why not round them up and airlift them into a ravaged, hurricane-hit area with no food, supplies, changes of clothing...? Let them see, first hand, how the other half has been living. Thusly they would be doubly punished: it would be a strong disciplinary measure, and because they wouldn't be able to empathize at all, they might find the experience to be a peculiar form of physical and mental torture.... but we don't really want to torture anyone, eh?
At 12:11 PM,
Girl With An Alibi said…
I'm liking the broom closet idea personally.
At 2:33 PM,
Sheryl said…
Barbara Bush visited a shelter and had the integrity to say that some of these people were better off now. My mom said she figured this was sort of the Bush equivalent to "let them eat cake."
I think the main thing is that there should be an 98.5% tax on all assets on anyone named George Bush who has been a President of the United States.
That tax will go to relief shelter throughout the country.
If you wanna place him in a broom closet as well, I don't mind, but my main concern would be to redistribute some of the wealth that family has stolen through their sleavy attempts to polarize wealth in this country. Of course, it might be easier to seize his assets if her were in a broom closet.
At 4:26 AM,
Samwick said…
Hi Sheryl. You are definitely right, the press is completely worthless right now. I'm all for tossing a few from their ranks into the broom closet. And I'm with you on Nancy Pelosi, she just strikes me as a huge phony. She has that vacant expression in her eyes, which makes me nervous.
I did hear Barbara Bush's comments. It's always nice to get a little window into how some people think, she showed a bit too much of her hand there.
Snave: we don't really want to torture anyone, eh?
Not unless your're Alberto Gonzales. Your plan is a much better, let's them experience what others have actually gone through. The broom closet, on the other hand, would probably be less effective (and just more fun for the rest of us. Wow, my empathy is boundless).
Thank you Ms. Alibi...good luck with all of your wedding preparations, I hope those are going well.
At 5:21 PM,
Sheryl said…
Nancy Pelosi makes me a bit nervous as well. I think she is afraid of blinking, so she keeps her eyes wide open and looks a bit freaky.
I don't know why they picked her. She really was a bad choice. Se has no charima. I don't know about phony, but definitely lacks presentation skills and therefore looks staged.
Oh well, no one asked me. I guess they figured they needed a woman, but they picked the wrong one.
At 1:44 PM,
Mindwyrm said…
Couple of things for you guys to read and then more than likely blast me over.
Barbara Bush was right when she said that a lot of people are better off when you stop and think about it. Before this happened they were stuck in a situation with little, if any, chance of getting out or improving. Now, they're in a position where they have choices available to them that never would have been options before. From a material standpoint of course they're not better off. Most of those people have lost most, if not all, of what they owned. What makes the situation better is they can essentially start over. New place, new opportunity.
If you're on welfare and you want to get a job, you're limited to the jobs available locally. Well, we all know that NO's job market sucked. Now these people, who wouldn't have been able to go elsewhere to look for better opportunity, have the chance to make a fresh start and put themselves and their families in a better position. Those who didn't lose everything still have their insurance payouts that are coming and will have opportunities to take that elsewhere or improve the home they had before.
I know it's hard to see a positive side to this for anyone. But this is a great chance for people who would have otherwise never had any opportunity like this at all.
Now, as for the press, what do you mean that they don't cover anything that Bush doesn't want them to? If that were true would we hear ANYTHING bad about Bush at all? No. Would Valerie Plame have become a household name? No. Would Bush's Nat. Guard records have ever been questioned? No. If the press was in Bush's pocket you'd hear about the chem and bio weapons that have been found in Iraq. You'd hear about how the overall economy is improving and the deficit dropped again. You'd hear about how FEMA and the Red Cross were in a position to go in but Blanco stopped them. Michael Brown would still be running the FEMA operation and no one would have questioned his qualifications.
The press puts forth anything they think will get them ratings. They are not as political as both sides of the spectrum seem to believe. They stand for one thing, and one thing only: themselves. This is why we get bad news on a daily basis from all the News Channels. Fox with their "The Pope is dead" fiasco or Rather with his 'fake but accurate' memos.
At 11:03 PM,
Samwick said…
"Couple of things for you guys to read and then more than likely blast me over"
Grrrr...arggghhhh...Aaaahhh!!! Well, I'm trying to blast you but I'm not very good at it. I have to polish my attacking skills.
Besides, I actually agree with most of your comments about the media. They're driven by money, not politics. They're scandal obsessed, doesn't matter of it's Clinton or Bush and they're worthless when it comes to reliable information.
As for your first comment, I would prefer that we find ways to address poverty ourselves and not just wait for a natural disaster to force citizens into better job markets. Not that you're saying natural disasters are preferable, you're just looking for some sort of positive to all of this. You're comments are always welcome here, Mindwyrm.
On a side note, I know some people would disagree that we should find ways to address poverty. A lot of people out there think it's every man for himself, no government "nanny state" should be involved. Which is odd to me since it's always these exact same people who supported the war in Iraq. Our citizens shouldn't rely on the government. Iraq's citizens? They should definitely rely on our government, and while they're at it, they should let the US military become their very own police force. A lot of Bush supporters have been a huge fan of the nanny state when it comes to other countries, which is odd to me.
I said this was a "side note", but it doesn't seem relate to anything. It's more of a "note" really, just something I've been thinking about as I've looked at responses to hurricane victims.
Sheryl: "Oh well, no one asked me. I guess they figured they needed a woman, but they picked the wrong one."
So, if I nominate you for the job Sheryl, will you run? In fact, just go for president, Hillary's a terrible candidate. You won't be the used car salesman Hillary is. I'll start printing up the signs and bumper stickers.
At 3:39 PM,
Mindwyrm said…
Matt, i think you and Eric from Grumbles before the Grave should get together and work out a way for the two of you to run.
At 10:40 PM,
Samwick said…
I'll have my press secretary contact his campaign manager. Since you came up with the idea, you get a cushy government job of your choice. Ambassador to some beautiful, exotic nation? A high paying lobbyist job? FEMA director?
At 6:20 AM,
Sheryl said…
Does that mean you are running against me now?!! Some nominator you turned out to be!
I didn't even see you had nominated me before you backstabbed me to run yourself. Ha!
Except that I am not running as President. I'm going for Empress of the Universe, which means that even if you win you will be under my thumb. Bwa ha ha
:-P
Oh, and Mindwyrm, if having all your things taken away so you can start from scratch is such a great way to make in life, I would be more than happy to take all your possessions from you. Even if most of your stuff is crap, I imagine there is something worth of having, and I can always sell the rest in a garage sale. Just remember, it's for your own good, so you can have a fresh start. :-)
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