Abortion Follow-Up
First of all, I apologize for my absence lately and my lack of responding. I'm pretty much going to be out of town all week, but tomorrow I'm posting links to various sites that have been exceptionally nice lately and, until then, I couldn't help but respond to something that came up in the post below. In the comment section, Mindwyrm asks, "Since abortion is usually defended as a reproductive right for a woman does a man have any reproductive rights at all?" An excellent question and one I am happy to answer:
No. Absolutely not. They lack these rights because 1. I say so, and 2. Men don't have babies. Their role in the reproductive process is limited to squeezing out a dollop of semen and then getting back to their bag of doritos and sportscenter. Women, on the other hand, get pregnant. (I know, this is complicated stuff). They have a squirming little pseudo-humanoid inside of them for nine months. The burden of pregancy belongs to women, therefore the reproductive rights belong entirely to them. Why would a lil' ole' spurt of ejaculation entitle a guy to anything? This stuff we'll offload into socks and/or fresh linens at the drop of a hat is supposed to grant us magical powers over a woman's pregnancy? Certainly the guy may have an emotional investment, a sincere one, but this doesn't give him any rights over a woman's body. And to me, this is just basic, common sense. I'm glad Mindwyrm brings it up because this viewpoint is out there, but the entire concept of reproductive rights for men is just bizarre to me.
"Honey, I'm considering having an abortion."
"Well, 'fraid not. I mean, obviously I have some say in all of this."
"But...I really feel like this is ultimately my decision."
"Sure, it's your body, blah blah blah. You'll have morning sickness, stretch marks. You'll have the 9 months of ballooning up before finally, mercifully, suffering the incredible agony of giving birth. But what about my hugely important role in all of this? I climbed on top of you that night, remember? I grimaced, wriggled around for a bit like a crack-addicted monkey and ineptly pawed at you with my clumsy, grasping hands...then, after (up to but not exceeding) three seconds...voila! I made my own gravy! Please, don't trample my reproductive rights here, I'm feeling a bit vulnerable right now. Hold me."
Don't think so.
No. Absolutely not. They lack these rights because 1. I say so, and 2. Men don't have babies. Their role in the reproductive process is limited to squeezing out a dollop of semen and then getting back to their bag of doritos and sportscenter. Women, on the other hand, get pregnant. (I know, this is complicated stuff). They have a squirming little pseudo-humanoid inside of them for nine months. The burden of pregancy belongs to women, therefore the reproductive rights belong entirely to them. Why would a lil' ole' spurt of ejaculation entitle a guy to anything? This stuff we'll offload into socks and/or fresh linens at the drop of a hat is supposed to grant us magical powers over a woman's pregnancy? Certainly the guy may have an emotional investment, a sincere one, but this doesn't give him any rights over a woman's body. And to me, this is just basic, common sense. I'm glad Mindwyrm brings it up because this viewpoint is out there, but the entire concept of reproductive rights for men is just bizarre to me.
"Honey, I'm considering having an abortion."
"Well, 'fraid not. I mean, obviously I have some say in all of this."
"But...I really feel like this is ultimately my decision."
"Sure, it's your body, blah blah blah. You'll have morning sickness, stretch marks. You'll have the 9 months of ballooning up before finally, mercifully, suffering the incredible agony of giving birth. But what about my hugely important role in all of this? I climbed on top of you that night, remember? I grimaced, wriggled around for a bit like a crack-addicted monkey and ineptly pawed at you with my clumsy, grasping hands...then, after (up to but not exceeding) three seconds...voila! I made my own gravy! Please, don't trample my reproductive rights here, I'm feeling a bit vulnerable right now. Hold me."
Don't think so.
posted by Samwick @ 2:21 PM
9 Comments:
At 8:36 PM,
Sheryl said…
Hell, I have all sorts of hormone issues because of my reproductive system, and I am not even pregnant. Nor do I intend to be.
Don't forget the silly menstrual cycles we have to go through every damn month from about 13 to 50 years of age. The lower back aches, the mood swings, etc. In fact, I am having one today.
At 8:37 PM,
Sheryl said…
Mood swing, that is.
At 11:39 AM,
Christopher said…
Think what a man will have to undergo if he dissuades his woman from getting an abortion.
He will be replaced by the baby in the woman’s affections. Much, if not all, of the romance in the relationship will now be gone, so sex will dry up. A good deal of what he earns will now go towards upkeep of the child, so he won’t be able to buy the sports car he always wanted. There are heaps of other sacrifices he will have to make, which, for reasons of time and space, I won’t enumerate.
Obviously, then, a man who would willingly make this sacrifice would be a good and loving father. So, is he not entitled to some consideration? We men have feelings, too, didn’t you know? We’re not all totally lecherous unfeeling beasts...well... only a little bit.
At 2:47 AM,
Coping Catherine said…
Totally off topic...but was wondering if you have any recommendations for books. ha ha. I am finally getting my ass out of college in 8 days and counting (thus why boobs have been on my site for a month) and need some reading for my trip to the UK. Currently have been told to read Angels and Demons, The Davinci Code, The Rogue Trader and The Great Reckoning. Looking for more... :) ha ha like I said...totally off topic
At 2:29 AM,
Sheryl said…
Christopher, I think you are making some assumptions there. The first being that the reason the guy doesn't want the woman to have the abortion is because he wants the baby. It could just as easily be a power play.
I think a lot of times if a woman wants an abortion it is because she knows that the person who got her pregnant is more self indulgent than responsible.
Like if he had worn a condom she probably wouldn't be pregnant to start with.
At 3:01 PM,
Impulsivecompulsive said…
I second Sheryl on that one.
Sure, there are plenty of men out there that would make great fathers, but forcing a woman to act as your brood stock just isn't the way to go about it. If a man honestly wants to be a father, there are options that do not involve using some woman like cattle. Adoption and fostering are legal, and far more ethical, and going through that process shows far more commitment to the child than simply pushing their whim on some poor woman who made the mistake of trusting them enough to have sex with them.
At 6:38 PM,
Sheryl said…
Yeah, and you learn a lot about a guy by how he behaves in bed, so there are things you might not know about his character until you sleep with him.
At 7:41 PM,
Impulsivecompulsive said…
Sheryl: I'd give that a Hell ya, ain't that the truth.
At 12:21 PM,
Mindwyrm said…
So your stance is that a man has no rights but can still have responsibilities? How can you say that you can hold someone legally liable for a situation but then say that they have no control over how the situation develops? Leave biology out of cuz no one...well, no sane person anyway, will argue the the physical burden is equal. What I'm talking about are the legal rights/responsibilities of those involved. We have tons of different statutes designed to counteract biological differences such as physical/mental handicaps or something as simple as skin color so why is pregnancy treated differently?
Women have the ability to relieve themselves of the responsibility of the pregnancy/parenthood at any point in time. You've got abortion and adoption and some places even have 'drop-off' laws where the baby can be left anonymously at certain institutions with no repurcussions. Yet men can be held legally liable for the children they father at any point in time with no recourse whatsoever. There are even cases, one in Alabama I think, where a woman had sex with a man who was passed out. She got pregnant and sued him for child support and won. He had no say in any part of the process from beginning to end.
The only answer I've ever really heard in regards to my question is that men have the right to not have sex so that's their reproductive right. I could just as easily turn that around and use it as a reason to outlaw abortion because, after all, women have the right to not have sex. It's a ridiculous argument for anyone to try and put forth.
Bottom line: if rights come with responsibilities how can a man have responsibilities but no rights?
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